apropos of nothing
Who Is R. Kelly's Surprise Witness?
Photo: Getty Images
Yesterday, after R. Kelly's child-pornography trail was rocked by claims that the singer had attempted to pay off a witness who says she had a threesome with Kelly and the alleged victim, and after it was rocked again by the Internet release of his new single, it was rocked for a third and final (?) time by a surprise adjournment when defense lawyers say they received a phone call from a "mystery man" who may have information that could help Kelly's case. "I have no idea what's going on," said Judge Vincent Gaughan, later speculating that the surprise witness may be able to debunk claims made by the prosecution. The witness is reportedly being flown to Chicago from another state and is probably being vetted by attorneys right now — but who is it?
Is it R. Kelly's pastor to assure everyone that Kelly is a chaste and decent man who doesn't know how to operate a camcorder? Or George Lucas, founder of motion-picture visual-effects company Industrial Light & Magic, who'll explain how someone could've affixed Kelly's computer-generated head to the body in the infamous sex tape? Or one of the Wayans brothers, who'll confess to pulling the stunt himself? We hope it's serial threesome-debunker Woody Allen — a Bananas-style self-cross-examination is probably the only way this trial could get any wackier.
Surprise Defense Witness Delays Threesome Testimony [Kelly Chronicles/Chicago Sun-Times]
Kelly trial adjourns after call from potential witness [AP]
